Yahoo User Movie Reviews

One of my fondest memories from high school is reading Yahoo User Movie Reviews during computer class, while our teacher attempted to explain to us how to save a Word document. I know they don't sound like anything particularly funny, but trust me: you can never underestimate the grammatical blunders, nonsensical insults, and even racial slurs that the general public will spout off to anyone who might be listening.

This Week's Movie: The Black Dahlia

I give it two thumbs up and two fat toes
by lalvarez05 (movies profile) Sep 15, 2006
5 of 28 people found this review helpful

I believe that who ever graded the Black dahlia doesnt know what really life is.. Life is about death, blood, gore

Josh: Did you know that the average person dies at least 80 times in their life, often due to blood and gore? Face reality, people. That's what life is.

NOT A CLASSIC. CRITICS ARE NOT NORMAL PEOPLE
by smokeymitchell (movies profile) Sep 15, 2006
4 of 7 people found this review helpful

Save your money and mind. Im the biggest feak of all, but this movie takes the taco.

Josh: It's possible that future civilizations, in trying to learn more about their ancestors, will find our old web servers, including the one with this particular movie review on it. They will read the sentence "Im the biggest feak of all, but this movie takes the taco," and will ponder its meaning. Academic discussions will rage. Eventually, wars will even be fought. The living will envy the dead.

Locale?
by abashar@sbcglobal.net (movies profile) Sep 15, 2006

When I heard this was filmed in Canada, I said to myself, self, this film isn't real.

Josh: Disgraceful. It's like The Lord Of The Rings: is New Zealand really what Tolkien meant when he said "Middle Earth"? I'm guessing no. F-, LOTR, everyone knows you're not even real.

BLACK DAHLIA
by andreadoloffo (movies profile) Sep 15, 2006
2 of 2 people found this review helpful

09/15/06 MAUI HAWAII USA 4:36 PM

AT A TIME WHEN WHAT IS NEEDED PORTRAYED IN THE MOVIE INDUSTRY, SUBSTANCE, INTEGRITY, LOYALTY AND THE BASIC MORAL VALUES, WE ARE INDOCTRINATED BY THE TYPICAL GARBAGE THAT EXEMPLIFIES THE MEDIOCRE INTELLECT OF THE AMERICAN INTELLIGENTSIA; NOT TO FORGET, THAT THE ULTIMATE GOAL HERE IS TO STIMULATE THE LOWER SENSES OF THE HUMAN SUBCONCIOUS CAPSULED WITHIN THE CONCIOUSNESS OF THE UNINTELLECTUAL MASSES. THE PREMISE IS TO CONTINUE TO DETERIOATE THE ESSENCE OF THE HUMAN SPIRIT; THE OTHER IS GOAL IS MONEY AND GREED AT THE EXPENSE OF THE IGNORANT. RESPECTFULLY SUBMITTED. ANDRE ADOLOFFO, ****.com 808-269-0879 CELL

Josh: ...seems accurate.

Forget about it
by bdom555 (movies profile) Sep 15, 2006

Watch, there will be psychos who will now repeat this horror. Lots of lucks, folks, & lots of bucks which is all you give a damn about. F-

Psycho: I hadn't thought too much about it before, but this movie makes me realize that I must kill people in the same way as The Black Dahlia! Thanks, suckers!

Hollywood: WHO CARES WE HAVE OUR BUCKS

A review of ignorance
by banshuwa (movies profile) Sep 15, 2006
2 of 5 people found this review helpful

If you are going to write a critique upon a film, whether positive or negative, make certain that you are able to communicate in the vernacular. The language and sentence structure of the reviewers is so poor, hackneyed and verbose, I wonder if they failed to understand the film because it was in english.

Josh: Verbosity is a problem in some reviews, Mr. Communicate-In-The-Vernacular, isn't it?

review of non-educated review's
by wesessary03 (movies profile) Sep 16, 2006

I don't give a flying ***** about someone who comes from off the street to give their oppinion. I want to hear it from someone who is educated in such matters.

Josh: Yes...yes! And these professionals, who would be tasked in critiquing the movie at hand, would supply their views on every movie that comes out via newspapers, magazines, and even the internet. Professional cinematic opinion-givers, they could be called, although I'm sure someone has a better name for them then me.

what was that all about?
by cubanitaofhis (movies profile) Sep 17, 2006
2 of 2 people found this review helpful

I have no idea what was going on. And I have a 3.9 my Senior Year.

Josh: Man, that's smart, dude. You figure that if anyone would be able to understand anything, it's a guy who has a 3.9 his senior year.

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