Dismissed Michael Jackson Jurors Sign Book Deals
Of the 200 potential jurors for the Michael Jackson child molestation case to be released from duty, 122 of them have been signed to lucrative book deals in which they will tell the gripping story of being passed over for jury duty and narrowly missing out on even more profitable book deals that are all but guaranteed for those that make the cut.
Penguin Publishing, Random House and Simon and Schuster have all reportedly offered numerous book contracts to those who went through the harrowing yet thrilling experience of being asked questions by the both prosecution and King of Pop's legal team.
"I didn't actually talk to Michael, but I looked at him a few times – I actually saw him!" exclaimed dismissed juror Linda Feinstein, who was excused after admitting to once having listened to Jackson's album "Invincible" all the way through. "I have so much to tell the world, like the time he came into the room and sat down, brushed his hair out of his face, and yawned. He actually yawned! The world has to know all of this, and I'll tell everyone for at least five figures!"
Luckily for Feinstein, Penguin Publishing hopes to draw into their fold more aspiring authors from the pool of prospective jurors as the prosecution whittles the number down to 12; the publishing giant is willing to give profitable contracts to any dismissed jurors who will recount the many different outfits worn by King of Pop and other titillating pre-trial details.
"We were planning on waiting until after the trial to begin releasing books about the courtroom details," said Penguin spokesman Robert Tarantino, "but the black suit with gold and red stripes that Mr. Jackson wore [on Monday] is worth two or three volumes in of itself. This way, we have insiders' perspectives on not only the color of suit, but the material and maybe even how it will impact the defense's case."
So far ten books have been ghost written by excused jurors since the jury selection process began on Monday. While the public currently has a meager choice between "My Fifteen Minutes With Michael", "Michael's Shoes: The Shocking Truth", "Why Was I Dismissed? I Was Acquitted of Buggery (Memoirs of a Dismissed Jackson Juror)" and a few others, the rest are being rushed to print and are slated to hit the shelves by mid-week.
"Oh my God, I just can't get enough," said Jackson fan Shanyla Hibbins as she waited in line to be the first customer to purchase new release 'Sitting Across the Room From Michael Jackson -- Telling it Like it Was'." "I don't think I can watch the trial -- all that stuff about child molestation and pederasty just makes me sick -- but I love hearing what it felt like for ordinary people to look at Michael from distances of 40-feet or so."
Others, however, have not been so lucky. Some of the dismissed jurors expressed disappointment over being denied not only their chance to perform their patriotic duty as citizens, but also missing out on what is sure to be a six-figure book deal in the days and weeks following the trial, which is expected to end in early 2011. High school art teacher John Brody, 31, was one of the potential jurors to be dismissed without a book contract or even interview with Cosmopolitan Magazine.
"If only I had run out of the room in disgust when they showed the video clip of [Michael and Janet Jackson collaboration] 'Scream'," lamented the Brody. "Everyone that stayed got booted for being 'a fan', and everyone that ran out the door or defecated themselves in horror is still in the running [for juror]."
Jury selection is expected to take into early next week and will include grueling Q&A from both prosecution and defense, including monitoring the juror's reaction to repeat viewings of the Lisa Marie Presley-Jackson smooch at the 1994 MTV Music Video Awards.