Bush Gives Mom Voucher For 'One Free Air Force One Ride' For Mother's Day

In honor of Mother’s Day, President George W. Bush gave his mother, Barbara, a hand-made voucher for a free ride on the Presidential 747, Air Force One.

“To be honest, I kind of forgot about Mother’s Day until the last minute,” President Bush told a reporter Sunday afternoon. “I’ve been pretty busy working on the campaign and then with everything going on in Iraq and the 9/11 hearings and all, I just kind of spaced on it.”

Bush reportedly spent the better part of the morning scurrying around the White House, looking for something he could pass off as a gift to his mother upon her arrival for the annual White House Mother’s Day Brunch.

“Normally, if someone’s coming over for dinner and I have forgotten their birthday or something, I can just have the staff wrap up a plate or one of those little White House Christmas ornaments to give to them,” Bush said. “People love that stuff.”

Bush added: “But something told me my Mom, having lived in the White House before and knowing the tricks of the trade, wouldn’t be too impressed by it.”

Around 9:30 AM, Bush finally sat down at his desk in the Oval Office, where he got out his markers and hurriedly made the “ticket” for the Air Force One ride, despite the fact that Barbara, in her time as First Lady of the United States, logged an estimated 1,200 hours aboard the plane.

“I was really just out of options,” said the President. “It was either the ticket or a piece of White House stationery with ‘Happy Mother’s Day’ written on it. I made an executive decision.”

The Bush family gathered in the dining room of the White House for the Mother’s Day brunch, during which the President attempted to slip the voucher into Barbara’s purse unnoticed inside a card that he had printed off the Internet just hours earlier.

A picture of the invitation
Pictured: the President's invitation, which took him over three days to make.

“Oh, well what have we here?” Barbara said, pulling the card from her purse. “Oh, it’s a Mother’s Day card from Georgie. And there’s a ‘ticket’ in it for a free ride on Air Force One. And he made it all by himself. Look, George, isn’t this cute?”

Bush reportedly left the room when brother Jeb surprised Barbara with a large oil portrait that he had painted of her and her husband, former President George H. W. Bush.

The voucher is said by many to be the "worst present" given by the President since his 25th wedding anniversary in November 2002, when he gave First Lady Laura a coupon for 5 free backrubs.

"Well, who the hell doesn't like a backrub?" an irritated Bush asked when his earlier gift was brought up. "Christ, you try to do something nice for people. and everybody jumps down your throat."

"Story of my Presidency," he added, shaking his head.

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