Husband's Opinion Causes Wife To Question Handling of Iraq War

Louise Benson said that her opinion of the way President Bush is handling the Iraq war -- previously positive, along with her husband Harold's -- has changed following Harold's statement that Bush needs to change tactics, and is not running the war very well after all.

Mrs. Benson's change in opinion flies in the face of countless GOP TV and radio ads that portray the war in Iraq in a positive light, which was the housewife's primary source of information until husband Harold informed her otherwise.

"I was convinced that the war was going well -- at least that's what Harold had been saying -- despite all the bad press and the mounting casualties," said the wife of the influential Benson. "But after he said that America will never win the war unless a new direction is taken, it became clear to me that something must be done."

The high school history teacher, Benson Sr., declared current US policy to be "flawed" in a dinner-time discussion on Wednesday, which convinced his spouse and two young children, 6 and 10, that the war is not going as well as previously thought.

"Daddy says that Bush President is have to win the war in Arack [sic] a different way," said Alasdair Benson, 10. "I think so too also."

Amongst household residents, the elder Benson is the favored foreign and domestic policy adviser, and is credited for influencing the direction the family's reaction to world events has taken.

"[Greg] really is the resident expert on things like politics and history and stuff," said Mrs. Benson. "He's also a huge Republican, so when he says that the war isn't going well, then you know that it's not just the media trying to trick us, and that things really aren't going very well at all."

Mr. Benson’s subscriptions to The National Review, The American Conservative, and The Weekly Standard continually reassure wife Louise that his opinion is correct and untainted by the confusing and always wrong liberal media, which, without his guidance, would mislead her into thinking bad thoughts about Republicans and the GOP.

"There have been a few times when I foolishly believed the newspapers, and found myself thinking that maybe the decision to invade Iraq wasn't wise, or that a border fence [along the US-Mexican border] is a bad idea," admitted Benson, "but thank goodness my husband corrected me before I could start believing the lies that the shameless Democrats would have us believe."

Louise prefers not to rely on her own understanding, she says, but to automatically disregard news from mainstream media sources about increased attacks on US soldiers and Iraqi civilians, opting instead to wait until husband Greg can explain why things really aren't that bad in Iraq, how the media ignores the "good stuff that happens over there", and how the liberal media distorts everything.

"You hear about one torture case in one prison like it's the apoco...apoco-whatsis, but you never hear about a soldier winning a star of some kind for bravery," she said proudly. "Greg told me all about it."

Louise admits that it's strange that her husband's opinion, typically dialectic to the mainstream, could intersect with non-conservative publications, but that husband Greg is much better off making that call than she is. She is proud to stand by her man.

"No number of figures, graphs, information or reports from the intelligence community could ever convince me that my husband doesn't know exactly what is happening in politics," proudly stated the supportive spouse. "Thank goodness he's around to explain all of that confusing stuff to me, or, God forbid, I might be a raging liberal, and ready to vote for Hillary Clinton in 2008 if I didn't know any better."

Mr. Benson himself acknowledged the fact that the intelligence he gathers is an important source of information for his family, and vowed to continue pursuing the truth by reading Reader's Digest and watching the Fox News channel.

"I'm proud to be able to provide ideas for my family," he said, "and I would never cut and run."

In Other News

U.S.
Conservationists Fear Dwindling Park Space Reduces Places Kids Can Safely Get High (07/13/10)

U.S.
Area Man's Use Of Pay Phone Angers, Confuses Coworkers (07/11/10)

Sports
LeBron James Announces Plan To Follow In Jordan's Footsteps, Play For Birmingham Barons Minor League Squad (07/08/10)

Politics
Anti-Incumbent Sentiment In Washington Kills Senator Robert Byrd (06/28/10)

Video
The Enduring Vision: A Documentary In Two Parts (06/21/10)

Letters
Your Letters Answered (06/17/10)

World
U.S. Identifies Vast Deposits Of Unobtainium In Afghanistan (06/16/10)

U.S.
BP Points Out That Oil Spill Could Give Rise To Toxic Avenger Style Superhero (06/14/10)

Health
Area Man Definitely Counting That Walk To The Mailbox As Today's Exercise (06/10/10)

Even More Shit:

twitter

HumorFeed

The Beast

RSS Feed

Paying The Bills:

--------------------