Area Man Is Such A Cool, Interesting Nerd
Local man Steven Cooke recently proclaimed himself a nerd on his blog, inviting friends, family, and online pals into his "strange -- yet neat, fun, and maybe even a little interesting ;) -- little world."
Cooke works as a software designer at a local company, and is fond of using the blog as a way to express his thoughts on software design, as well as pop culture and his life in general.
The proclamation drew several "LOLs" from his followers, who generally agreed wholeheartedly with his assessment.
"Lol, I no u r," wrote a follower of his blog named qtboi84. "U r such a nred [sic]!"
"Sounds good," said user katiesmom0293847, "I just don't understand it though...! You're so smart!"
Most of the comments posted on the site were in agreement with Cooke's claim of nerdom; however, one follower was quick to dispute the authenticity of Cooke's assertion.
"Your [sic] not as nerdy as me," commented user and blog follower K1ngKn1ghtElegorn. "I just watched 18 hours of obscure Scandinavian comedies that I downloaded! Heehoo, I'm such a nerd!"
The comment led to a nasty flamewar between Cooke and K1ngKn1ghtElegorn, who presumably do not know each other exceptionally well and only follow each other's blogs out of common courtesy.
"My farm in Facebook Farmville is growing at an exponential rate!" exclaimed Cooke, who also posted a screenshot of his Farmville farm on a photo site linked to his blog. The caption of the photo read: "I'M SUCH A NERD."
K1ngKn1ghtElegorn, not to be outdone, replied within 40 seconds by stating in leetspeak, "y0ur n0+ 3v3n cl053 2 45 n3rdy 45 m3, l0s3r!"
"Leetspeak" is a form of letter substitution, in which combinations of ASCII characters replace Latinate letters. It is considered the highest form of Internet nerdiness in existence and a general waste of time.
"These 'nerds' and their highly developed subculture and language are intriguing to scholars like myself," said Dr. Ethylyn Cummings of the Johns Hopkins Neuroscience department. "Somehow, effortlessly, they are much cooler and more interesting than everyone else. Scientists believe that it has something to do with their appreciation of things that most people don't care about."
Of course, not everyone online is a nerd -- self-proclaimed or otherwise. Some are simply normal people who write about what they think.
"Filipinos are second class citizens, and ass-washers to chinese people," explained one YouTube user in response to a video of an Asian man.
Another user reasoned, "YOU WILL GET KISSED ON THE NEAREST POSSIBLE FRIDAY BY THE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE. TOMORROW WILL BE THE BEST DAY OF YOUR LIFE. HOWEVER IF YOU DONT POST THIS COMMENT something bad will happen. NOW UV STARTED READIN DIS DUNT STOP THIS IS SO SCARY. SEND THIS TO 5 VIDEOS IN 143 MINUTES WHEN UR DONE PRESS F6 AND UR CRUSHES NAME WILL APPEAR ON THE SCREEN IN BIG LETTERS. THIS IS SO SCARY CAUSE IT ACTUALLY WORKS THIS ACTUALLY WORKS."