Man Interrupts Porn Session For Brief Thought To Flood Victims
So impacted by the flooding, looting, and other troubles in New Orleans and other areas was Jerold Yurtz that he made special room in his bi-nightly ritual of looking at Internet pornography to "think a little thought" for those less fortunate than he.
Yurtz, a 43 year-old single resident of the seldom-hurricane-hit state of Virginia, says he felt like he "needed to do something".
"I surfed on over to the usual site [last night], my pants already half unzipped," he recalled. "I remember vaguely thinking that I was in an Asian kind of mood, but nothing concrete was decided yet. The point is, the night was young and full of possibilities. I didn't really know where I was going to end up."
But little did Yurtz -- who had heard of the flooding but had not realized until inadvertently turning on CNN for a second earlier that day that people were "being affected by it" -- know that the night, while indeed eventually leading to Asian pornography, would also include a thought about the victims of the flood.
"I was having a little pre-session snack of some Whoppers and Coke, when I dropped one of the Whoppers into my lap, where I guess I had spilled a little Coke earlier," Yurtz, who has an ample lap, recalled. "And I looked down at it, sort of floating and bobbing around in the Coke, losing its chocolate coating. I realized, 'Hey, that could be a person down there. And now nobody's going to want to eat them.'"
The subsequent thought -- not to be confused with a prayer, says Yurtz ("I didn't go that far") -- for the victims lasted about five seconds, and was as compassionate as it was necessary.
"I just didn't feel right typing in asiansluts.com right after looking at that Whopper," he said. "Partly because I felt a little guilty and sorry for all the people who can't look at porn at the moment, and partly because it really killed the little mood I had going for myself. I even was forming an idea in my imagination to get things going, where I found a young Asian model trapped in a pool, and I went to save her from drowning, but she wasn't actually drowning. She was just hot for my body."
In fact, this half-formed fantasy nearly ruined Yurtz's thought, but he held firm.
"I started to think, 'Hey, maybe they don't have it so bad, since I'm sure at least a few of them are hooking up there in the flood waters.' But even so, I kept it up and felt bad for them. I think the actual thought was like, 'Boy, it sucks that they're down there. They should've left faster.'"
Immediately thereafter, Yurtz continued with his pornography viewing and subsequent masturbation sessions. Still, he claims the flood victims remained in the back of his mind.
"I ended up not using that drowning fantasy, but I almost did, and I might use it some other time," he said. "And it's all thanks to Hurricane Katalina."
There is some speculation that Yurtz's toilet, which he clogged later in the evening and did not attempt to fix, could have also reminded him of the flood victims stuck in the Louisiana Superdome, which itself contains overflowing toilets, had Yurtz known of this.
When interviewed, many of the flood victims expressed their appreciation for Yurtz's compassion.
"It's nice to know that somewhere out there, people are taking a break from their daily routines to give us a thought, even it's not a blood or money donation," said one man floating by on a piece of driftwood. "It's things like this that will get us through."