Obama's Historic Inauguration Makes People Realize That Presidents Are Inaugurated
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Barack Obama's inauguration as the 44th president of the United States is destined to go down in history, not just as the election of the nation's first African American Commander-In-Chief, but as the event that made Americans aware that all new incoming presidents are inaugurated.
"You mean we got one of these things every time a new guy is elected?" said one man incredulously, on his way to the nation's capitol to see what he had previously believed to be a "strange-yet-wonderful African-American ceremony".
He is not alone in his surprise; out of the 50 people we interviewed who were gathered in Washington, D.C. for the historic event, 46 had never even heard of the word "inauguration" before a few days ago. The remaining four were obviously liars.
"Listen, I'm sure they had a small private welcome ceremony for past presidents, like maybe with a cake that said 'Welcome!' on it or something," said Bertha Walton, an annoyed woman, "but you're obviously mistaken if you're going to try and tell me that this in-awgration thing has happened before. This is historic."
Others did not react so belligerently to the news that other presidents have indeed been inaugurated; some, in fact, did not seem particularly shocked to hear the news.
"Hell, I can barely manage to get my ass to the booth to vote half the time, and even then I usually just decide based on what I imagine my dead grandmother is telling me," admitted one sometimes-voter. "So I can't say that I'm stunned that apparently they have this kind of crowd parade thing all the time."
In addition to revealing the ceremonies associated with bringing a new president to the White House, surveys show that Obama's election has also taught Americans other trivia about their country, including the fact that elections come every four years; that there are 50 stars on the flag, and that each star stands for a state; and that George W. Bush was their previous president, but is now leaving.
"Wait, I thought Bush left a while ago," Bertha Walton told us, furrowing her brow. "Didn't we just go without a President for a few years there?"
